Do You Struggle...

to hear the voice of God?

I shook my head as the pastor asked that question during today's sermon.

I hear God's voice all the time. Had the pastor asked, "Do you struggle to "follow" the voice of God?"

I would have smiled and nodded.

I am a child of God. Time and again, my heavenly Father advises me.

I know it is Him. From deep within my being comes a persistent, calm voice of ultimate reason – one that sometimes seems unreasonable or profound but, upon reflection, is absolutely right.

Like a child pushing the parental boundaries, I sometimes rebel – insisting upon MY way. And to what end? I find my Father's guiding hand around my shoulder comforting me: You'd have saved yourself time and energy following my instruction.

That's how it happened Sunday. I was on my way to a bridal shower – ALONE – doing a GIRL thing. I left right after church. No looking back – at the house, its messes, lunch preparation, whatever... "A free day off," as Noah would say. He and the rest of my guys would spend the afternoon with the church youth group frolicking at a local hotel in the water park.

I drove in silence – southbound over the hills, winding through the forest and onto the main highway toward my hometown. If all went well, I had an hour to spend before the party's start. I intended to shop. I needed a big roll of batting – a supply for my Norway trip fundraiser.

It was in that BEAUTIFUL silence – away from the noise of my parental duties, I sought God.

My heavenly Father said:
Just go to the party.


I replied:
What?
I can avoid temptation.
I can conquer the fabrics.
I just need batting.


Just go to the party.

I need the batting.
I have the coupon: 50% off plus a $10 gift card.
It won't get any cheaper than that.

Just go to the party.

I need the batting.
I have ALL this fabric to make potholders to sell to fund my Norway trip. I also have blankets to make.

Just go to the party.

But I have time today.
I need the batting.
The big batting roll might not be my local store when I get there later this week.


And so, the battle continued during my hour drive in "silence" with the Lord.
His: Just go to the party.
countering
My: I need the batting.


I got into town with time to spare. I went to the store. I combed the aisles of beautiful bargain fabric. I resisted temptation. I found a giant batting roll. I took it to the cutting table. I asked, "Do I need a slip or just take it to the checkout."

The clerk said, "You need a slip. Do you have a coupon?"

"Yes," I nodded. The store phone rang. She excused herself. I dug in my purse, found the flyer and paged to find the coupon. It wasn't there. I paged once more. Nothing. I looked at the flyer date and realized this was the old flyer. The new one with the BIG savings coupon was left at home. The clerk returned. I explained my trouble. I put the batting back.

And I drove to the party... in silence.

This time, I spoke first:
OK God, I know. You told me so.
I should have heeded your voice: Just go to the party.


I told my story about heeding His voice several times that day. I figured: Okay, I can still try again later in the week at our local store. No big deal.

But that night, I got a bigger surprise. God took the advice to the next level. I opened a forwarded email from a fellow church member. One of the lines PENETRATED my heart. It read:

"A rich person is not the one who has the most, but the one who needs the least."


Long ago, I understood "materialism." Recently, I've made strides to "simplify." (One step forward. Two steps back?) But now, this thought struck me. "How can I justify buying more... to sew more... to sell more... to earn more... for my trip?"

For months, God has been asking: "Do you trust me?"

When I say: "Yes. But..."

He asks again: "Do you trust me?"

I say: "Yes..."


And He replies:

"Then let it go.

('IT' being the old ways: making and peddling wares – and even – the worries of 'how.')

"I have a better way. Trust Me."


I hear His voice.
And yet, I struggle.

Do You Struggle...